Song Of The Ticketed Motorist
(Sung to the tune of
"Swing Low, Sweet Chariot")
Refrain
Ride low, road chariot,
Don't get fined while on your way home;
Ride low, road chariot,
Don't get fined while on your way home.
I ran toward my parked car with someone after me,
Coming for a ticket to give;
A caffeinated meter maid on a writing spree,
Coming for a ticket to give,
*
Refrain
*
I looked up at the lamp post and what did I see,
Waiting there a ticket to give;
A brand new red light camera looking down at me,
Waiting there a ticket to give.
*
Refrain
*
I had an open beer can on my car's front seat,
Someone's job a ticket to give;
The cop who did the giving wrote it fast and neat,
He knew his job was tickets to give.
*
Refrain
*
If you:
jaywalk,
litter,
don't shovel sidewalk snow,
don't get your kid to school on time,
post graffiti,
spit in public,
have a broken car tail light,
don't fasten your seatbelt,
Or do what most folks might sometimes do;
They'll sure be a reason a ticket to you give,
To generate some muni revenue.
*
New Refrain
*
Lay low, with fingers crossed,
Not all get tagged on their way home;
Lay low, with fingers crossed,
But be prepared to bitch and moan.
******
©2010 Michael Silverstein
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