An usually large number of rich nobodies are running for the Senate this election cycle, most claiming to be qualified because they are "outsiders." Since there are just 100 senators and more than 300 million Americans who aren't senators and are therefore outsiders, that doesn't seem like much of a reason to vote for any of these bozos. And in keeping with this observation... 

The Rich Outsider Candidate Song

Oh give me a home, 'neath the Capitol Dome
A place for the wealthy and vain,
There I'll legislate, and you know I'll be great,
'Cause I once owned a large soft goods chain.

I, sure want that seat, 
Being a senator's neat,
I already have got, 
A Queen Mary-sized yacht,
And this gig will make my life complete.

Oh give me a home, 'neath the Capitol Dome,
Watch me there endlessly fillibuster
My opponent you know, is a Washington pro,
She's liberal, so you can't trust her.

I'm, out to unseat, 
A four-term incumbent defeat
I know how to get it, 
The games that will net it,
With help from nice folks on K Street.

I've got a long reach, millions worth of free speech
And I'll spend what it takes on this goal
My pals say "by jingo, go get 'er good, Bingo, 
I'm the toast of the club's eighteenth hole.

Boy, it will be sweet, 
To join with the senate's elite
I ain't never lost
Since that nasty divorce
Who'd begrudge me this small mid-life treat?

******

©2010 Michael Silverstein

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