"Nowadays, you can't turn on the TV without some talking head telling you about the economy. Yet, in a world overrun by 'analysts,' only one man has the guts, the brains, and, quite frankly, the poetry to put it all in perspective.That man is Michael Silverstein... Silverstein is a true intellectual." — Gersh Kuntzman, The New York Post

"Few people have found much to laugh about in the stock market this year. Michael Silverstein is the exception. The Bard of the Bourse can find humor in losing money, globalization and stock options." — USA Today

More Of What The Critics Are Saying
About Silverstein's Verse

 

The baseball season doesn’t officially open until April 1. But spring training is already well under way in Florida, and this being the case, it’s obviously time to start rolling out new parodies of Ernest Lawrence Thayer’s immortal paean to the game, "Casey At The Bat."

A couple of years ago, the obvious titular substitution for Casey in a Wall Street version of this poem would have been Alan Greenspan. Since the Fed Chairman isn’t as mighty as he once was in moving markets, however, I take another tack in the "Nasdaq Off The Mat" verse that follows.

The original "Casey At The Bat" was first published in 1888. If you take the time to read it over today, I think you’ll feel as I do—that it’s probably good for another two or three hundred years.

Nasdaq Off The Mat

It looked extremely rocky for most Nasdaq stocks this year;
A bubble bust recession had investors in despair.
And when computer sales slowed, and telcom earnings sank,
Some long-time market players put their money in the bank.

Japan’s humongous debt load held no promise of relief;
The euro zone’s own troubles was another cause for grief;
As Argentina’s flounders caused its lenders all to scat,
Investors wondered what could lift poor Nasdaq off the mat.

Then better unemployment news a sudden rally powered;
The service sector surged ahead, new auto sales flowered.
Consumers showed they’d rather spend than sit around and pout,
And suddenly eternal hope again began to sprout.

Alas, with each new bullish sign there came a maybe-not;
Was the comeback overstated, was it all a bear trap plot?
Investors sought both high and low a perfect comfort stat;
They’d throw in scads of money, if only they’d find that.

Oh, somewhere there are people who don’t care if markets fall;
And somewhere there are folks who laugh when Greenspan drops the ball;
And somewhere no one gives a fig if tech stocks hit a bump;
But there ain’t no joy on Wall Street when the Nasdaq’s in a slump.

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